Unconventional Love

When I was teaching social work before, I have lesbian student who often seated at the back and even if you will ask her to come and occupy the seat in front she will refused because she said "she's not comfortable". She's very shy and seldom participated in the class discussion and most of the time enjoys being alone. Being her teacher, I asked her one time why is it she keeps on isolating herself? I told her that if you are planning to become a social worker then you much practice mingling with others so that you will learned to socialize. Then, she replied "actually Mam, I just took up this course because I don't know what course to take and I also want to understand myself but I don't have intention to graduate". Listening to her reasons, made me asked her then, "will you just let it be that way?" and then she gave me a response "Just give me time Mam, because, you know as of now I have lots of problems, I feel so unloved and I think no one really understand me".

So the days goes on,and since our subject is Introduction to Social Work we need to discuss Basic Ethical Principles of a Social Worker. The primary principle is "acceptance". This means that you need to accept your client as a person with inherent rights and dignity. Then, my students were discussing about "What if you have sexual hang-up? take for instance, you are homosexual or you are lesbian then, how will you learn to accept others when in fact, you have problems within yourself. The discussion continous like acceptance should start within you. Then, are you sure that other people will also accept you? Most of the students commented that in our society we have different treatment towards homosexual relationship then how will you deal with this?. There's so many questions which had been discussed but eventually since the principle is "acceptance" so it simply mean that if you are a person who cannot accept others for who and what they are therefore Social Work course was not meant for you.

It's a coincidence that it's valentines day also on that day, it's February 14, 2007

After the class my lesbian student approached me and asked if I can meet her somewhere to have a date on valentines. Actually, to be really honest, I was thinking she's asking me for a date on that day but since we had just discussed the principle of acceptance, I don't feel turning her invitation down or it will just lead her to think that I don't mean what I preached. So, I accepted her request to meet her in one of the fastfood at 2:00 pm in NCCC Davao.

So, when I arrived in the place, I saw her smiling and she told me "Mam, I'm glad you really came, I have surprised for you". Then, she asked me to sit down and wait for her to come. So, I just seated silently waiting for her surprised then she came back with a beautiful smile on her face with a sexy girl and then, they seated in front of me. She introduced the girl to me like "Mam, this is my girlfriend. I love her so much, but I can't bring her home although, I really want to marry her but since you told me about acceptance, I want her to meet you." It quite struck me, but I hold my emotions and breath and so, I shake hands with her girlfriend and after that she kiss the girl and hugged her as if she was so happy on what she had accomplished on that day. Then, we eat together and after that I left them and told then that they can continue with their date.

This is an experienced that struck me when I was teaching. I can't believe that beyond classroom we have so much influenced to our students even in their very personal life and they believed in us and they think that even if their parents will not accept them for sure we can understand them.

But beyond, what I saw on that day, I realized that love is itself was not purely exclusive for men and women but it can also be for other gender who longs respect and acceptance for their preferences.

I am still asking how many unconventional love was celebrated every valentines day. Then, how many are happy and satisfied with this arrangement?

So now, when I saw roses on the street I think about how many lesbian gave roses to their partners? and also how many gays received roses?

Well, I am so glad to have that kind of experienced in my life at least it teach me real things in this world. We are different but we have one desire. That is to love and be loved. No matter what they tell us?